I’m someone who has tried for a lifetime to manipulate time and push against boundaries. Time and limits were the enemy. I’ve lost most of those battles from a young age yet I’ve kept coming back for more. In grade school I’d stomp angrily at having to stop playing on summer nights because it got dark and was time to go in and get ready for bed. In high school and college I’d put off writing papers till the night before they were due and pull all-nighters. In adulthood skirmishes continued. I’d get to the Post Office two minutes after the grate had been pulled down, arrive a few minutes late to most meetings, have to apologize profusely for not meeting a customer’s deadline, send belated birthday greetings and Christmas gifts–you get the picture.
As we do when we’re unenlightened, I’d blame my time and boundaries issues on everyone but myself. I’d joke that it was my mostly my dad’s fault. After all, he’d INSIST that we arrive EARLY to everything. I especially hated being a half hour early to our Catholic church on Sundays where silence ruled–all the pews were empty and it was silent and boring! For years I’d joke as I apologized for being late that I was balancing out 18 years of being too early for everything.
I got to thinking about time and boundaries as a new year started and we began reading the 4th scroll in the Master Key Experience that has brought so many new insights to other areas of my life. These words struck me especially hard.
I will concentrate my energy on the challenge of the moment and my actions will help me forget all else. The problems of my home will be left in my home. I will think naught of my family when I am in the market place for this will cloud my thoughts. So too will the problems of the market place be left in the market place and I will think naught of my profession when I am in my home for this will dampen my love.
There is no room in the market place for my family, nor is there room in my home for the market. Each I will divorce from the other and thus will I remain wedded to both. Separate must they remain or my career will die. This is a paradox of the ages.
Og Mandino, THE GREATEST SALESMAN IN THE WORLD
“I will concentrate my energy on the challenge of the moment and my actions will help me forget all else” is another way of saying the ancient wisdom BE HERE NOW. This time I’m hearing it loud and clear. Accept the time. Accept the boundary. BE HERE NOW.
Over these months we’ve learned a lot about how the conscious and subconscious work, about brain chemical addictions, and about the flow across the corpus collosum of right brain and left brain activity. We’ve been reminded that science tells us there is no such thing as so-called multi-tasking–that the brain is equipped to do one thing at a time. Multi-taskers are really misusing their brains, subjecting them to constant switching between tasks. Research has proven that we get more accomplished with focus on one thing at a time.
So I’ve finally been able to stop fighting time and boundaries as I move into this new calendar year. Why? Instead of expending all that emotional energy to fight against what is, I’ve been given new tools in MKE to embrace what is, including time. I am able to value boundaries. My new habits of thought and action away from multi-tasking that I’ve been building day by day for 3 months have brought me to a new level of consciousness, a new level of self-awareness, and a new level of peace. I’m clear about my Definite Major Purpose. I’m clear about how to spend my time. As the scroll suggests, I can now fully experience the marketplace when I’m in the marketplace. I accept its boundary, and no longer let work spill over into my personal life and personal time. For years I’ve let my personal life and my true love of spiritual exploration sit on the back burner and grow cold as I’ve let down personal boundaries to let work take over my whole life, thinking that was the way to cash flow. It wasn’t!
I’m so grateful not to have to be at war any more. Time has expanded. Boundaries are a gift. The new year will be abundant.
Hey Shirley I really enjoyed reading this blog because all I could see in first paragraphs were myself. You had me cracking up because those were actually the same experiences I encountered You were right on point with Scroll 4. So glad you shared this blog.
Shirley, Thank you so much for posting this blog. I really needed to read it today. I have been late all my life. In my adult life I blamed Auburn University because they said that the class began at 8:00 but in reality it began at 8:10 and ended at 9:00. I also blamed my parents because you know that as child has no control over if we were late or not. I need to just stop blaming others and take responsibility for my own actions.
PS. I had to share!
Shirley, good for you for your realizations. You are on your way to becoming your desired best self. From your blog rover friend John.
Yes, we are ALL further on the way as we move forward in our alliance, helping one another.
I’ve been sharing your writing, too, Linda!
Oh, Linda. Once again we find out how alike you and I are! Thanks!